So I haz some big news.
Tomorrow, I am three years sober.
I wrote about this for the first time at day 82 of my sobriety–and it really changed everything for me. Sharing. Telling. Standing in the light.
That’s not the big news. But it is also big news too.
I have told the story of my sobriety (and the night the darkness almost got me) so many times that you guys are probably sick of hearing it at this point. Someone told me so, actually. #trollz
However firstly… the news.
I officially went inactive with the Georgia Bar.
Whoops. This is also not the big news because I haven’t practiced law in any capacity in over a year in order to focus on writing books and other things that don’t pay nearly as well as practicing law, but are rewarding in their own ways—like writing book(s), coaching, podcasting and motherhood.
So back to December–and the news. December is a month that I tend to do very big and shocking things—and always about this time of year—and I don’t mean the boxes coming from Amazon.
This time, it’s actually not my “fault,” this big news thing.
And really it’s not a big shocking thing at all… people do it all the time.
And a lot of you might not even care a rip anyhow because it doesn’t have to do with you.
But. I have never lived outside of Georgia.
So I thought it would be fun to traipse our family to a whole other place and state and culture and CrossFit gym and Starbucks.
Toto, I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore.
Oh, but I DO!
The Expert landed a job that made sense for 360 degrees of our lives. There are pinpoint holes in this theory—like leaving our family and the only place we have known. And being damn near 40 (me) and much, much, much older (him—ha ha, I kid, I kid)… something in us knew that if we didn’t leap, we never would.
So we are leaping. We are moving from Georgia. The move starts on December 28th, for the love.
Destination: Overland Park, Kansas – a suburb of Kansas City, Missouri
We are starting over in a new place with no family nearby and no soft place to land.
Although from all the people who have already known the news and contacted me–I think this is going to be a very soft, warm and kind place to land. We have found a house to rent, a Lifetime Fitness to lift weights and swim in… and I have scouted out the Starbucks. Which to my delight wins the most original spelling yet.
Regardless… prayers appreciated. Chocolate too.
In these last three years of sobriety, I have learned so much about myself, life and others.
I have learned that stress is compounded by substance abuse; that reality and fears are multiplied and darkened by alcohol; that alcohol is the biggest effing liar on the planet–and don’t let anyone tell you differently; I am a different person when I am forced to feel all my feelings; feeling the feelings is hard–but it’s better sober, especially the next morning; and our free and secret community of sober warriors is the bomb.com.
I am glad to be moving at a stressful time of year, stone-cold sober and steady. I am encouraged with the confidence that if I can quit drinking before Christmas three years ago–I can certainly move to Kansas and be okay.
The question for me about MY addiction was: Why am I hanging on to this addiction? Why am I bargaining with myself? Well, I didn’t know why. But I now know the freedom of sobriety–the freedom of a voice in my head without that bargaining is true escape, true freedom.
And I am grateful for every single damn sober day that I no longer have to bargain with myself about just one, or I will quit tomorrow, or I can have just two at the party and drive home. Life on the other side of the bargain is better. If you think you want to quit drinking–you will never regret it. You are missing out on absolutely nothing. I promise you.
So that’s the news!
Looks like the book tour will kick off in… Kansas City. ?
Wish us luck. Normal people have movers coming three days after Christmas right? #thoughtso
Writings about MY Sobriety Journey:
- A Sobering Thought
- Teetotaler
- Not Giving a Sh*t is a Way to Have a Terrible Life
- A Homework Assignment
- Romanticizing a Monster
- Moderation (Schmoderation)
- Why We Can’t Fill Our Cracks
- The Dry Drunk Routine
- Why I Quit Drinking During the Holidays
Podcast Resources about Alcohol:
- Annie Grace on The Same 24 Hours (Episode 29)
- Sarah Hepola on The Same 24 Hours (Episode 24)
- Meredith on Annie Grace’s “This Naked Mind” Podcast
Praying that y’all will have a easy move and that you enjoy the new adventure.
Awww…Kansas is WONDERFUL! You will love it! Friendly people and lots to do. KC and the surrounding areas have lots of sports activities to participate in. And if you explore a little deeper into Kansas or Missouri you will find some incredible opportunities for adventure. Throw your name into the lottery next month and ride the Dirty Kanza gravel bicycle race thus summer. It’s a world famous bicycle race in the beautiful Flint Hills of Kansas!
Best of luck on your move. I have been following you for years. I just left a town I lived in for 16 years, that I ran an all women’s triathlon club in for 15 years (a wonderful support system of women), and raised my kiddosin. My son started college, and as an empty nester we moved out of state, away from his college that was 50 miles away, and I find myself without my children, my friends, and my club. So I guess I can say, I feel you! Lots of changes, but change is good. Wishing you the best of luck on your new adventure! I am sure you will thrive with your magnetic personality.
Good for you! At your age, I followed my “expert” to the middle of nowhere, and in retirement he gave back by moving back to civilization at least half the year. It’s lovely. You will be fine as you support each other on your new adventure. You might want to check out Lifetime Fitness instead of LA Fitness. They are usually cleaner! Just sayin. Thanks for all you’ve done. Being AF has saved me, and your support made it happen!
I began following you almost 10 years ago. I too am a mom, recovering attorney and once upon a lifetime ago, an Ironman. I have not looked at your emails or blog in 3+ years until this morning when I quite accidentally clicked your email. I had no idea you struggled with alcohol. Alcohol has destroyed my family. My husband, who I still adore and love more than anything (except God), is now my ex-husband. Our two daughters (7&8) have called me from his home in tears because he’s passed out or smoking cigars inside the house and it burns their eyes. I hear rumors of strip clubs, one night stands, prostitutes, you name it, it has happened. Without a shadow of a doubt, the most painful part of alcoholism isn’t the ripple effect; it is watching a person you love, admire and cherish slowly disappear into someone you don’t know. And you cannot do anything about it. In fact, in trying to do anything, you become the enemy. I write all this to say: celebrate you today. Celebrate your determination, discipline and your ability to let yourself hurt. Sobriety is not a decision for the faint of heart; it is hard. It is far more than simply deciding to stop drinking. Celebrate that you made a decision that showed yourself and the people that love you that you value yourself and their love. Celebrate that your children will know your story and the legacy you are creating is incredible and invaluable. Congratulations times 1000!
I left in KC about 12 years ago and I still miss it! It’s a great city! There are many museums and other wonderful places to see. Make sure you hit up Country Club Plaza for the Christmas lights. Union Station shows off nicely this time of year, too. There isn’t a bad seat at Kauffman Stadium if you like baseball. Westport is a great little section of town too! We keep moving all over the country, but I would love to land back in KC. I wish you much happiness!
You’ve got this!
We’ve moved from Minnesota (some family, one kid born here) to Cincinnati (some family, one kid born here) to Seattle (no family, first triathlon and century ride!) to the Chicago area (my husband’s entire family).
That last move happened in January, so I hear you on movers coming shortly after Christmas!
Moving, especially away from family, can really be an advantage as a couple – you learn to rely on each other in a different way when you don’t have parents or siblings nearby.
I always love learning my new neighborhood/city, learning the new bike and running routes, the best places to use as a turnaround stop for a cup of coffee, the most beautiful summer and winter routes…
OH! You’re going to get much more winter than you did in Georgia – do you have the gear for that?
I moved a year ago from Florida to San Diego (between Thanksgiving and Christmas – what a fun time to move!). It was a massive move for me – I had lived my entire life on the east coast and knew almost no one out west. I also did it entirely by myself without a husband or kids. I’m loving it so far. I still miss my friends and family back east, but now I have a new set of amazing friends I never would have had if I hadn’t taken that leap.
Congrats!!!
Having moved every few years my entire life, I love the excitement and anticipation of a new town, home, and adventure!!!
You’ve got this!!!
Take it from someone who has moved (several times) across the country, HOME is where you make it. Although family may not be in the same city/province/state, they are with you wherever you go. It’s an opportunity for new experiences, new adventures, new circles. You never “leave behind” you build upon! Enjoy the experience and all the “new” you are about to experience. Best wishes!
Meredith- Oh My goodness!!! I’m in tears!!!! I can’t say how much your family means to me!!!
I am happy for all you though but I will sure Miss All of you So much too!!!!
You and your family were an answered prayer for me!!! I will Always be So grateful!!!
I Love All of you So Very, Very much!!!!!! I wish All of you the Very Best Always!!!!!
Love, Joni